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Lawyer Jokes


 
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In the courtroom, it's where a lawyer really becomes an actor. There's a very fine line between delivering a monologue in a play and delivering a monologue to a jury. I've always felt that way - I've been in a lot of courtrooms. The best lawyers are really theatrical.
-Woody Harrelson


People do not win people fights. Lawyers do.
-Norman Ralph Augustine


Lawyers are the only persons in whom ignorance of the law is not punished.
-Jeremy Bentham


Of course I've got lawyers. They are like nuclear weapons, I've got em 'cause everyone else has. But as soon as you use them they screw everything up.
-Danny DeVito


 
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Dear Judged


Dear Your Honor,
Dear Judge,

Do you ever experience any physical danger in the courtroom?  You do deal with all those criminals, right? 

Sincerly,

Concerned Bailiff's Mommy



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